What notable things happened today?
The most notable thing that happened today was my niece and her boyfriend got engaged! đ
We love them both and are very happy!
Tag: relationships
Life Among The Dinosaurs
Do you remember life before the internet?
I am so grateful I grew up before the internet existed!
I think back to life in my 20s and I would have been a MESS if I had a telephone at my fingertips, never mind being able to text, or swipe, or google, or Find My Phone someone!
Ironically, the internet would have been really handy when I met my future husband in Jamaica in 1987. He lived in California and I lived in Connecticut. We learned about each other through letters and phone calls and at the end of five months I was on my way to live with him. Imagine that! I didnât learn everything about him on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter.
Balancing Work and Home
How do you balance work and home life?
For the past 25 years, it has been a tightrope walk between work and home because my husband and I run a business together. Some of that balancing act involved the two of us but a lot of it, was my balancing.
Our remodeling company started in our basement, an unfinished, low ceiling space with a concrete floor and painted stone foundation walls. I faced crumbling painted walls at the bottom of the stairs and when my husband came home at 4 p.m. to start his estimates, he faced the oil tank.
Having a fledging business at home made both the work and home balance tough. Being home, I would realize there was laundry to do, or something needed cleaning, so Iâd get immersed in that. On the weekends, Iâd go to the basement to do/finish the laundry and remember a proposal to type or phone call to make and get caught up in that!
After the basement we moved the office to space above our newly built garage and then almost 20 years in, we purchased office space about 10 minutes away. Each step away, made the physical work/life balance easier. However, I found myself determined to put in as many hours a day as possible because once I left for the day, that was it. My husband put in his 7:30 to 4 and I would try to get in at 8 a.m. every day and usually stayed until 5 our shortly past. Now, mentally it was very taxing knowing there were things I was leaving behind but definitely couldnât sneak into the office to take care of. I found myself bringing files home but letting them sit there and never touching them all weekend!
As far as my husband and I balancing business and home life together, we made a decision early on that work stayed at work. It hasnât always been easy but if I was mad at âmy bossâ, I didnât want to bring it home to my husband and vice versa! It was sort of weird and definitely an act of compartmentalizing but it has worked for us. After a few years, we also decided that our company wouldnât physically work on the weekends or go to any estimating appointments. People found that strange but we told them, âeveryone needs their weekendâ.
My husband has now retired, but is still available when my son, who took his place, needs him. I am still working, but now that we have a very capable Client Manager and I have been able to pass all client work on to her, I am able to come in later, leave earlier and take some time off and I finally feel like there is a good and healthy balance for me both physically and mentally.
Balance in the Coming Year
Itâs the end of my Birthday Month and my march towards 65. I donât mean that in a bad way, more of a contemplative one.
My husband has retired and I can now find him most days out in his garden preparing for the season.
Iâm looking for balance in my work and home life. My three office responsibilities have been pared down to two thanks to our incredible Client Manager who has successfully taken over those reins (and it is sometimes like trying to rein in wild horses).
I have projects at home to work on – organizing 35,000 pictures on my devices, family stories or family history research.
Honestly, I enjoy what I do in the office. I feel like now I can organize and set up the business in the best way possible moving forward – and get that Succession Plan, aka âIf Something Happens To Meâ plan in place.
My goal is to consider Wednesdays and Fridays each week and schedule something, whether full day, half day, by myself, with my husband, or with a friend.
I see the possibility now whereas a year ago, I donât think I saw it.
A little bit of this contemplation comes from the fact that my mother died the day before her 65th birthday. If youâve been over to Itâs All About Family youâll know her story. It was 9 weeks sudden, but sudden enough so she never got to experience that retirement.
I think about what her and my dadâs life might have been like if she didnât get sick and it makes me want to honor and appreciate each day.
Short Stories
May is Short Stories month and I enjoy reading them. This book caught my eye at the library last week so I checked it out.
The title doesnât really seem to match the stories which all contain some type of illicit affair. A high school senior with her teacher, a couple of long distance relationships that get by between visits with phone or computer sex, and few, there are 11 stories in all, with the same characters at different stages over the course of a few years.
They were humorous for the most part and I actually enjoyed them (I spent most of the afternoon reading!), but in some of them I was fearful they would get caught, or annoyed that they could be so rotten to their spouse.
I cast no judgment but know itâs not something Iâd ever do to my husband of 35 years! But in my 20s at the end of a couple of shitty relationshipsâŚâŚ
Thoughts From The Passenger Seat 