Tag: thoughts

Posted in 2025, Writing

Replay by Ken Grimwood

Posted on by nancyb422

Is there an age or year of your life you would re-live?

I happened upon a book in the late 1980s named, Replay, by Ken Grimwood. It starts out with a middle age may having a heart attack at his desk. When he comes to, he’s 18 years old and in his college dorm room.

Think about that – being able to replay your life. What kind of changes would you make? Would you be kinder? Study harder? Take more changes? Or be less reckless?

As much as I would like to do all of the above, anything I did would change the trajectory of my life. If I don’t date that dolt again, it wouldn’t lead me to the love of my life because how would I know what I shouldn’t put up with? Or would I seek out the love of my life sooner, because I know where he is? But doesn’t he have to go through his own situations to work his way to me?

So I guess if I could replay my 20s with the knowledge of where I need to be at a particular date and time, I’d live them smarter both in brain power and common sense.

Posted in 2025, life

Mowing the Lawn

Posted on by nancyb422

First it was the Roomba, now it’s the Automower.

We drove by a neighbor’s house this summer while he was watching his automower, mow his front yard. He sets a pattern and off it goes. Evidently, it can sense the end of the yard, but can you imagine, watching it get loose and go off down the street? At $2,000 for some, that would be a sad loss!

I live on just under a half an acre and it is all cut up into parts. Growing up, my sisters and I would mow the lawn pushing a little Lawn Boy machine. It was so light, that if I was in a hurry, I could power walk/run it over the lawn. Maybe not the greatest job, but I’m not sure anyone cared!

We had the front yard, near back yard, way back yard, tennis court, and under the maple trees, and that’s how we mowed. All of it was flat, except for a tricky part on the side of the house that headed down to the tennis court, which was not, but possibly was, as it was a large rectangle, great for games. The way back had an old patch of asparagus, that we mowed over. Under the maple tree section was barely any grass, a lot of dirt and sticks that would kick up and scare the sh*t out of me!

“Hey, I’ll do the way back today!” I liked mowing the lawn, putting my foot on the motor and pulling the cord to get it started. It was not even a self-propelled machine, just a straight up powered push mower.

After we moved back here, we’ve had a variety of mowers, self-propelled which I’ve used, but my husband prefers the riding mower which probably has a 0 degree radius for getting around the few trees left in the yard. We even had a lawn service for a few years, but I could do a better job with that old little LawnBoy mower!

Do you mow your lawn or would an automated mower be more your style?

Posted in 2025, leisure time

Saturday Morning

Posted on by nancyb422

I love sitting in my comfy family room chair on Saturday mornings drinking my two medium sized cups of coffee reading emails and watching the crazy birds at the window feeder. Today, they are particularly out of control –

Blue jays have taken over
“Get away!”
“How many can we fit?”

Usually the birds sit on the roof above, but we’ve added a little “eyebrow” over the window which initially confused the birds but now they wait their turn on the side supports or the roof of the pergola. Or float in mid-air waiting their turn.

A little window dressing
How long can the wait like that?
Just hanging around!

We have all the common birds of Connecticut: the house finch, tufted titmouse, northern cardinal, blue jay, mourning dove, field sparrow, and probably more. The cardinal family is particularly bossy, the mourning dove barely fits but can’t resist, and the blue jay is messy, and sometimes will allow smaller birds to share their space.

When it gets quiet at the feeder it’s usually because of this –

“Moo” the watcher

We’ve seen feathers around once or twice but I do love cats so it’s hard to hate him! When he’s elsewhere in the yard, he will give you that cat stare but meet up with him in the road and he will happily lay down and give you his belly to pet!

Posted in 2025, life

Fri-yay!

Posted on by nancyb422

I was so happy when I heard our weather forecaster mention the moon and Venus so close together this morning. I made sure to look up when I went outside.

The moon and Venus

I’ve been so good about NOT documenting my every trip outside but this morning brought me such joy

The glow
Sun through the trees

I love to capture the brilliance of the sunrise but the sun through the trees as it comes up is so special too. Many trees in our neighborhood are HUGE because they’ve been there in the 64 years I’ve been here.

I’m grateful for the trees and my neighborhood. It’s such a special place!

Posted in 2025, life

Never Say Can’t

Posted on by nancyb422

The ant and the rubber tree plant, the flower (or weed?) growing out from the crack in the sidewalk, and this single lavender bud growing on a plant winding down.

All not taking can’t be done for an answer.

Posted in 2025, Healthy Living, life

Digging In

Posted on by nancyb422

If you are a reader here, you’ll see I can be “in my head” a lot.

I am reading a book entitled, “High Functioning” overcome your hidden depression and reclaim your joy by Dr. Judith Joseph.

I have told myself that I don’t fall into the perfectionist category and a lot of what she says about overworking was something I did in the past, but not now. However, by beating myself up mentally, I think I should be perfect, or strive to be perfect. Both in my work and my “being”.

She says it relates back to “trauma” most times childhood based, but not always. There can be trauma with a capital T or it can be lower case t.

What I’m more concerned about is that feeling of “blah”. Anhedonia – the reduced ability to experience joy in life which makes you feel meh or blah all the time. For me, I t’s a feeling of doing to get through the day and then the night. When did that start?

I have begun to explore how all this figures in my life. I can see why I am never (never ever) happy with my weight or shape.

I’m beginning to understand some thoughts and reactions in my marriage.

As my business coach says, “what gets measured, gets improved”.

I’m looking forward to digging in deeper.

Posted in 2025, life

9:37 AM

Posted on by nancyb422

If you were to look at your clock on this Saturday morning and it said 9:37 am, would your brain say, “ONLY 9:37 am yay!” Or “OMG already 9:37 am!” ?

I am in the camp of “OMG Already?!”, but I literally have nothing planned for the day, nothing to do except work out (heading there now), hit the Farmers Market (open til 1 or 2pm), read, and do some ancestry research.

I make myself crazy.

Posted in 2025, thoughts

Struggling

Posted on by nancyb422

Do you ever have days that you just struggle to get through it? To get work done? This is me. I am there.

What is the cause? Is it all the news that just seems to get worse every day? I don’t watch news but I do subscribe to a couple of sites for daily updates. They don’t overwhelm me and anyway, I can’t put my head in the sand and say, “oh well, so sad but it’s not about me.”

When are the congresspeople who are equally angry going to speak up? Step up? Band together? Anyone?

Posted in 2025, life, thoughts

What I DIDN’T Do

Posted on by nancyb422

I walked into the bank today and waited for a teller to call me over. There was one other customer there.

I handed my teller the deposits and walked to the counter to grab a lollipop. As I turned back, out of the corner of my eye, I thought I recognized the woman. When I heard her voice, I knew who it was. Someone from high school. Someone who was on the cheerleading squad with me. Someone who I’d call an acquaintance, or someone that I used to know.

Hmmm….do I just kept my head turned and sneak out after my transactions are done? Or do I find my friendly face and say hello? What to do what to do!

I turned toward her and said, “I’d know that laugh anywhere!”. We shared a hug, had a small conversation, I collected my receipts, and left with a breezy, “It was nice to see you!”.

It would have been so easy to just ignore her, and go on my way. I feel a smidge better that I didn’t.

Posted in 2025, Healthy Living, life

Advice From One Who Knows

Posted on by nancyb422

I may be 65, but sometimes I think my mind is stuck in my teens. Or maybe it’s because I’m a Taurus?

Anyway, I’m like a dog with a bone. If I get a thought, especially a negative one, I can’t let it go. Money, bills, employees – it’s what swirls around my head all day. And if there’s a comment from someone rebutting me on a Facebook post about creating affordable housing in my town (I’m for it by the way) – yikes!

But then, I watched the New Heights podcast with Taylor Swift as their guest. It was one of the most entertaining and enlightening two hours I’ve had staring at my screen in a long time.

What snapped me to attention was when she said, “What you spend the energy on, That’s the Day!”. THAT’S THE DAY.

I have to say in my defense, I am only a week and a half back from a 10 day vacation cruising along the coast and inside passage of Alaska but even I’m saying to myself, Enough’s Enough!

I currently say a morning prayer to get myself right with the day and try to get a 5 to 10 minute meditation in, but, it looks like I need to add an additional mantra to the day.

Yesterday’s monarch butterfly flitting around me

What do you want to spend your energy on?