Tag: high school

Posted in 2026, Memories

The Note

Posted on by nancyb422

It was the end of my sophomore year of high school and the end of a school-year long romance. An up-and-down, go round-and-round romance.

I cried a lot. I must have, because he gave me a box of tissues along with a small give for my 16th birthday. What a guy.

By the end of the year, we were barely speaking because he was avoiding me. I had to go to a girl friend in the group to find out what was going on. Evidently the fall was coming soon.

He expressed in words (his and evidently others), what he couldn’t say to me directly –

The Note

We broke up not long after, without me draining the DNA out of my body to become someone more suitable in his eyes.

Posted in 2026, Memories

Least Impressive Award

Posted on by nancyb422

I was listening to something on the radio a few weeks ago. Likely just two DJs on the radio, but they were talking about the least impressive award they ever received. It was humorous, but I guess you had to be there!

It made me go back in time of course, to two awards I received 4 years apart, that to me were not what I wanted. They both made me feel shame because, although one was done in jest, I didn’t think that way about myself! Bear with me, I’m going into the Way Way Back machine.

Eight grade awards ceremony. Yup, 8th grade. I received an award called, “My Affair Lady” . Did I say this was a catholic school? Two classes for each grade at the time. So yeah, I had a couple of boyfriends that year. There were some tumultuous moments during the year. But did “the committee” really have to put it out there? I think what made it worse was, it was my twin sister and her friend who created the awards. I can still picture the friend really laughing it up. I’m sure I gave a smile and laughed but I felt the jab.

Senior year of high school. Class Superlatives. You know the ones? Best Smile, Cutest, Most Class Spirit. Me? Class Flirt. Wah-wah-wahhhhh. Pattern anyone? The superlatives are voted on by the class but once they reach the yearbook committee, all bets are off. If someone was top two in a category and they were on the committee, they picked which one they wanted, and give second place the other. I don’t sound bitter after 48 years do I? Anyway, yeah, Class Flirt. I guess I didn’t stray far from “My Affair Lady” did I? The male Flirt was someone I knew well, and he IS a shameful flirt. I was not like that, I thought to myself. I’m friendly, I talk to people (only boys evidently). But votes don’t lie right? We had our picture taken and it’s there for all eternity.

Why do I even care? Because I know that events like this affected my identity and self-worth as years went on. I might not have changed my pattern, obviously that was already ingrained, but it colored how I saw myself and what I thought about myself. Past events are going to be carried with you whether you say, “Oh that didn’t bother me at all” or not.

Posted in 2026, life, Memories

Comparison

Posted on by nancyb422

“Comparison is the thief of Joy” is often attributed to Teddy Roosevelt, but it dates back much farther than the end of the 1800s. There are references to it in the bible telling us that “to compare oneself to others, steals joy and leads to sin.” Ok, a little deeper than I intended to go.

Comparison… how can you NOT compare yourself to everyone around you when you have spent your life being compared to someone else?

It starts early as a twin. Weigh a little more? Measure a little longer? Eat more, drink more, poop more. Getting the picture yet?

Move on to school. Who’s smarter? Better at math, better at reading, drawing, nothing changes. But wait ’til high school!

High School….who’s prettier? friendlier? who’s dating whom? She didn’t say hi – you must be the friendly one! Oh, wait, you’re the one that didn’t say hi to me last week, I guess you’re both bitches! And cheerleaders! How did you both make it at the same time? That’s not fair! You must know someone! Oh, you’re the better cheerleader! Wait, maybe she’s the better cheerleader, I forgot who is who!

The comparisons ended at the end of high school for the most part, but the damage was done. The damage was done years ago. The damage was done as soon as we went to school. How could it not? People, adults and children alike, are all human. People don’t think of the words that hit like pebbles every time a comparison is made.

When we were in 8th grade or so, poring over our cousin’s high school yearbook. There was a set of twins graduating that year. Pretty girls with long, blonde hair. One was so pretty, and the other was pretty, but just not quite as pretty. As if the picture was fuzzy. That’s how I felt right up until we graduated.

Comparison of everything under the sun subsided long ago and all that’s left is how I feel about my body. I glance at other woman to wonder if they are as short as me? Where do they find pants to fit? Are they forever unhappy with the shape of their body?

Why do I care? I’m strong and fit.

“Comparison IS the thief of Joy”